GoldbergBlog

Stupid Fucking White People, Part II

Remember my post a couple weeks ago about a high school Caucasian Club? Yeah, good times.

Well, now Boston University’s College Republicans have made a move right out of PCU: the (I shit you not), “Caucasian Achievement and Recognition Scholarship“. Now while I agree that affirmative action is a hot-button issue, you don’t really point out the foolishness of something by doing something even dumber.

My personal problem with affirmative action is not that it’s “racist” but that it’s a temporary solution to a larger problem. If these kind of hires and admissions are based on race, it’s because the race is not on equal economic footing. We need to level the playing field and affirmative action only provides a band-aid which neglects the root problem of solving the racially-based economic segregation.

But people who make moves like this don’t understand that. They don’t understand the history and the economics of affirmative action. They just see liberal guilt and assume that it’s institutionalized racism. But all races are not equal. White people weren’t made slaves, weren’t segregated against, weren’t lynched, weren’t treated as second-class citizens, and aren’t currently victims of economic segregation. And while you can argue that current white people aren’t responsible for that racism, to ignorantly assume that all races are entitled to equal treatment when the reality is painfully unequal, is an action worthy of smack to the face.

You want to know the scholarship White people won? It was when they were born white and would have the luxury of never getting racially profiled, stereotyped, and easily dismissed. That’s why it’s dumb to have the Cracker Award of Excellence or whatever the hell it’s called.

Racial Profiling…for Kids!

The box says ages 3 and up but my cynicism makes me choke on my own snark as well as the tiny pieces.

Nazi PR Was Somewhat Lacking

Wal-Mart is selling Nazi SS skull t-shirts

Which then allows me to lead in to this glorious bit of comedy:

[youtube=http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FsNLbK8_rBY]

White Power!

Caucasian Club creates imbroglio - The Washington Times: Nation/Politics

I like how the article doesn’t touch on why such a club is pointless in the first place. Want to know when Americans embrace white heritage? Step one: Get a calendar. Step two: done.

I just hope another enterprising student one-ups her with the White Male Protestants club.

Election 2006: For & Against

So the Democrats took control of the House and remain on the brink of taking control of the Senate. Right now George “Macaca” Allen wants to make sure that Virginia voters don’t want his xenophobic, anti-semitic ass in congress.

But while it pains me to agree with a bag of douche like Tom DeLay, I have to echo his words:

“The Democrats didn’t win. The Republicans lost.”

As I watched CNN last night, it seemed that a general distaste for Republican corruption and the mishandling of Iraq pushed voters to change the balance of power and hope that a new direction would lead to better results.

Personally, I remain cautious. It’s hard to get behind a party that allowed such boondoggles to happen in the first place. The Democrats rarely seem to stand up and take action. They’re purely re-active. They don’t fight the battles that need fighting. They only seem to fight battles they can win. Why haven’t they made any attempt to curb Presidential power? How can they proclaim to take us in a new direction in Iraq and then allow something like the Torture Bill to pass?

I’m not experienced enough in politics to know how the next two years will shake out. Will this country move in a more liberal direction with Democratic House Speaker and and liberal committee chairmen? Or will the next two years be a deadlock between Presidential vetoes and the lack of two-thirds to override in the Senate?

I’d like to be hopeful. I’d like to believe that this Democratic congress will not only change the direction of this country, but give Americans a reason to vote FOR Democrats in 2008. Because next time, they’ll really have to earn it.

Election 2006: VOTE.

I don’t want to hear, “my vote won’t count.” I don’t want to hear, “voting is for suckers.” I don’t want to hear, “I’m too busy.” If you don’t vote, then I don’t want to hear you complain about the government. And if you’re too cynical to vote, then it’s clear that what you truly enjoy is being cynical and not actually trying to make a difference about the things you care about.

So take the half-hour out of your every two years and stop disgracing us with low voter turnout numbers.

My Uncommon Sense of Humor

So I’m bored on a Saturday Night. I decide to turn on the TV. Sure I could read a book or do some writing, but then I wouldn’t have stumbled upon the new comedy hit Dateline’s To Catch a Predator.

Yes, I’m aware that sexual molestation of minors is a serious offense. But Dateline plays the whole thing like a grown-up version of Punk’d. And it’s a struggle to decide which is funniest: the screenname’s these guys use (”marriedandlooking31313″), the excuses they use once they’ve been caught (”I was just asking for directions”) or reporter Chris Hansen reading their chat logs (”You are raising my horny level”).

But so far, my favorite line is definitely the detective asking the sex offender, “Astroglide. Is that some kind of sexual lubricant?”

I’m now writing a comedy sketch parodying this program. And yes, I’m aware that my sense of humor is a little off (although perhaps not that off since Borat made over $10,000 per theatre last night, which, for those that don’t understand Box Office, is phenomenal).

Jagshemash!

Go see Borat today. My review should tell you why (like you need an excuse). Also, the reviews section of the page is going swimmingly, so you should read all of them, not just the Borat review (like you need an excuse).

Also, I’ll be uploading reviews for The Prestige, The Departed, Stranger Than Fiction, and Fast Food Nation over the weekend so look out for those.

But anyway, make time to see the funniest film of 2006 this weekend or else you may find yourself in this unpleasant situation:

Election 2006: Enough Stupid To Go Around

Click here for original story.

John Kerry: For botching a joke about the armed forces. The joke, “You know, education, if you make the most of it, you study hard, you do your homework and you make an effort to be smart, you can do well. If you don’t, you get stuck in Iraq,” was supposed to be followed with “Just ask President Bush.” Unfortunately, Kerry dropped the punchline about our C-student leader and made it sound like dumb people serve in the army (unless they’re rich enough to get a cushy assignment and then they can just go missing for a few months). But in a moment of harsh truth that Mr. Kerry can’t say but I can, our troops may be the bravest but they’re not the brightest. You know how I know? Because the army recruits high-school dropouts. I’m not saying the entire military is stupid, but this is not the work of diabolical geniuses.

George W. Bush and the G.O.P.: John Kerry botches a joke and he, the one who DIDN’T puss out of military duty, the one who DIDN’T piss all over the honor of receiving a Purple Heart, the one who DIDN’T lie to get us into a war and would rather have thousands and thousands of U.S. and Iraqi deaths on his conscience than admit defeat, and it is Kerry and NOT Bush that needs to apologize to our soldiers?

Thankfully, Kerry found his spine (although it would have been nice if he had it during the 2004 Election, dipshit) and responded with

“I’m sick and tired of a bunch of despicable Republicans who will not debate real policy, who won’t take responsibility for their own mistakes, standing up and trying to make other people the butt of those mistakes,” Kerry said. “It disgusts me that a bunch of these Republican hacks who’ve never worn the uniform of our country are willing to lie about those who did.”

The “Liberal” Media: Let’s put it this way…

Time to explain the incident clearly and concisely; not showing favor to either side but rather just telling the truth: about two minutes.

Time needed to fill 24-hour news cycle: About twenty-four hours.

After you do the math, you’ll be left with a whole lot of bullshit and a whole little truth.st